A Huge Test & a Toy Horse

When I was little, I had an enormous collection of toy animals. Little figurines of horses, dogs, cats, whales...everywhere. I LOVED animals, and I would play with them all day long.

Well...I grew up. The toy animals were boxed and put away. Maybe someday I'll have a little brown-eyed girl who loves animals and won't be able to contain herself when she finds out that she's going to her grandparents' house.

I currently have two of the toy animals in my possession. One of them is a little stuffed dog who goes by the name of Freckles. My sweet godmother gave it to me when I was about 6 or 7 and was sick while on vacation at the lake. He sits on my bookshelf in my room, and every time I look at him I always shoot up a prayer for Aunt Sue and her family.

The second toy animal I have is this horse:

I want to tell you the story of how it came to my possession.

This horse wasn't a part of the collection when I was little. It was actually given to me when I was 17 years old.

It was towards the end of May 2008, and I was due to take the ACT for the second time. I had made a 25, which isn't a bad score, the first time. Statistics showed that if a student takes the ACT a second time, their score will go up a couple points. So, Momma signed me up.

A few weeks before the ACT, one of my very best friends was killed in a tragic accident. When I look back at the hardships I've had to endure, I can definitely say that losing my friend is one of the hardest things I've ever had to travel through. I remember the Saturday of the ACT...I was in a depression. I was sad, angry, confused, and just a little bit lost. Because of my depression, I was definitely NOT in the mood or state to take an enormously long and gruesome test. I remember looking at my mom when she woke me up that morning with tears in my eyes. I remember pleading with her, "Momma...do I have to go?"

Momma wasn't about it. She said, "Come on, Jenny. You can do this. It'll be over before you know it. Then you can come home and rest." She made me get up and go take that test.

About 4 hours later, Momma came and picked me up. We went to the grocery store and made a stop at The Dollar Tree. When I got back into the car, I found this toy horse and a card sitting on my seat. "My Maria" (which is what my mom calls me from time to time, because my first name is Mary) was written on the front of the envelope. I opened up the card, which was beautiful, and on the inside she had written, "I am so proud of you for getting up and taking that test today. I got you this horse. I love you, Mom"

I picked up the horse, and as I was examining it my mom said, "You see how that horse is ducking his head down? I thought that matched this situation so well. Sometimes, life is hard...but you just gotta duck your head down and keep moving."

I had been given a huge test. It wasn't the ACT (although that was pretty big, too). It was the test of my faith and my hope.  I couldn't see in the darkness around me. My faith had yielded to sight. I couldn't control the situation of my friend dying. My hope had yielded to possession. How was I ducking my head and still moving? What was driving me?

I'll tell you what it was. It was love.

The love of my momma. The love of God himself.

When I look at that horse, I think about that situation...but I also think about my Jesus.

At the Mount of Olives, Christ prayed, "Father, if you are willing, take this cup away from me; still, not my will but yours be done." (Luke 22:41)

"Momma...do I have to go?"    

"Just duck your head down, and keep moving."

Out of pure, beautiful love Christ took up his cross, ducked down his head, and kept on moving. All the way to his glorious resurrection.

If you are going through something, and if you feel like your faith and hope aren't anywhere to be found, cling to love. Cling to the love given to you by your family and friends. But most importantly, cling to the love of the Lord. Then do as He did: Duck your head down and keep moving.

When I was a child, I used to talk as a child, think as a child, reason as a child; when I became a man, I put aside childish things. At present we see indistinctly, as in a mirror, but then face to face. At present I know partially; then I shall know fully, as I am fully known.

  So faith, hope, love remain, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13:11-13

Peace be with you :o) 

p.s. I got my ACT results a couple weeks later....I made a 27 :)